As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
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The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
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Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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