I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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