I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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