Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Alive.
So much puke
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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