Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
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He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
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I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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