So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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