Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
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Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
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Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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