Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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