In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize