I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
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You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
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The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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