If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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