Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize