I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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