your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I just cut my nipple shaving
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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