i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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