I don't think brook has ever known best
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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