Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
The beer is more important than you right now.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize