Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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