Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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