talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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