New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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