We're facebook friends in real life
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize