plz talk dirty to me
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize