Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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