Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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