all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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