Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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