did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize