I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize