so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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