you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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