I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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