It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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