just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize