I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
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