God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize