So drunk, too bad you don't want this
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize