I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize