I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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