Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize