It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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