last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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