It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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