Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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