I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
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answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
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Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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