ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the day after is always just damage control
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
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i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
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Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
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