And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize