Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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