I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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