This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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